I am an Elephant

A little about elephants:

1. They console each other by hugging

2. They mourn their dead

3. They can recognize themselves in a mirror

4. They live in matriarchal societies

5. They have long memories “elephants never forget”

6. They can point

7. They maintain and care for the environment in which they live, for example, maintaining pathways and access to water which helps other animals.

8. They communicate in a multitude of ways, like trumpet calls (some sounds are too low for people to hear), body language, touch and sent.

9. They also communicate through seismic signals - sounds that create vibrations in the ground - which they may detect through their bones. Elephants, listen with their feet.

10. They are altruistic, and will help other animals (and humans) despite danger or harm to themselves.

I’m pretty sure that even though they never forget, with all that elephants are, in their capacity to show grief, humor, compassion, cooperation, self-awareness, playfulness, and excellent learning abilities they MUST be capable of forgiveness. But this is something that I have long struggled with.

With the huge amounts of information we are receiving ever day about the treatment of indigenous children, the calls to action, the burning of our world and the affirmations that we, as a society need to change now, I can feel it in my feet, I can feel it in my bones - there must be a shift in our society if we truly want to survive, and by survive, I mean survive as a species. The physical changes to the earth, the barrage of social inequities, the stark reality that we are all we got and we need each other.

I have to keep reminding myself, that people grow, they learn they have the capacity to become better, but I’m hung up on not forgetting.

I remember what people have said that has hurt me. I remember the actions they took (or didn’t take) that affected my life, or showed me how little they cared for the things that affected my life or me as a person.

And it makes it hard, when we connect on one level but are so far apart on others. When that pain/anger is a wedge and damages my trust.

I want to leave you with a positive quote or a southing thought but I can’t right now.

So I’m asking for myself, and anyone else that struggles with forgiving , how do we heal what divides us when we can’t forget past harms? When those harms are the wedge? When that wedge is the fuel in the fire of our anger. How do we come together as neighbours, citizens, and as a society? How to we bridge and bring back that trust?

Especially when one party doesn’t seem to recognize the harm they have done?

With all the love I can muster

,

Christine